Crowded – 1

I met a cute and somewhat petite guy, a level ahead of me the week I resumed for my third year in University. I liked him from the first conversation we had. He was friends and in the same class with a good friend of mine at that time. We met at Chapel and were sat next to each other. The next time we met, it was also at the Chapel. I was very single and excited at the thought of a possibility. I could see he liked me too.

I can’t remember why the girlfriend topic came up and then he said he had a girlfriend. I was shocked and disappointed. This was our second time sitting together and I had fallen. I decided to let it go.

Unfortunately, we seemed to cross paths every time I got out of my hostel especially in the evenings. I wondered why he wasn’t with his girlfriend since that was the time people got to chill with “the one”. I found out they were in the same class. Before long we knew where to find each other “accidentally” in the evenings. I loved his company, we had a good laugh always and he was cute. A few weeks later and he was calling me his Barbie. By now I had forgotten all about his girlfriend. Never met her, never seen her, no one talked about her but I knew we had to appear as just friends to the public.

At 19, only one boy had kissed me (I feel holy writing this!). So the first time he kissed me, my stomach was in knots, my heart was pumping hard. We were supposed to be to studying in college building and the lights went out. I went to a Christian university where at a point, talking to someone of the opposite sex was prohibited. I don’t want to write the name of the school for fear of being expelled for this even after graduating 9 years ago.

Anyways, he would pick the hidden classrooms for us to “study”. Before I knew it, we were kissing at every opportunity we had. The stairs were a favorite spot too. He would walk in front and just corner me in case I tried to “front” like we shouldn’t be doing this. I was smitten.

One afternoon, I was done with my class and was walking past others having classes. I saw him and got giddy. His class hadn’t even started. He looked at me and looked away. I was confused. And then I saw her for the first time. My heart dropped. It felt like I was hit with a rock on the head. I think I missed my next class. I literally ran to the hostel to calm down. That was the first time it dawned on me, he had a girlfriend! I wasn’t the one. I just wanted to pass out. My pride was hurt. That night I didn’t go out to meet with him. My friend came back from the night rendezvous and said he asked if I was OK. I planned not to go out and meet with him anymore but by day 2, I couldn’t hold back. I wanted to slap him, scream at him and hug him. I went out that night and he asked what happened last night. I was looking like are u dumb? I saw you with your chick and what am I? but I couldn’t say it. I just sat beside him and gave him attitude. He was solemn too, we didn’t talk much. The next night I didn’t come out. I wanted to find out about the girl I saw. Who was she? Why her? How come she never came out in the evenings?

By now, we were about 7 weeks into our “relationship”. I was going through a cycle of emotions. Anger, love, bitterness, resentment but most of all, I was now distracted…

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